Hurt
by eulalie27
Summary: When Sulu gets injured, it's up to Kirk to let Chekov know. Some days, Kirk really hates his job. Rated for language.
1. Kirk

My heart pounds as I walk slowly down the hallway towards Chekov's quarters. I hate this part. Being the bearer of bad news. It's times like these where everyone figures that since I'm the captain, I should know how to handle everything, how to fix anyone.

It's times like these where I want to scream at them, _I'm human! I can't do it all!_

It's times like these where I really kind of hate my job.

I knock on the ensign's door. "It's the captain."

"Come in."

I wish he didn't sound so cheerful right now. I wish he were quietly working hard, at least occupied with something to distract him when I had to leave him alone to wallow in whatever emotions he felt.

For a moment, I can't bring myself to move. Then the door opens, and I realize I can't just stand there like an idiot.

Chekov is indeed occupied, fiddling around with something on his desk. He stands when he sees me and his face falls. "Hello, Captain." Something in his accent is dark, like he knows this isn't good.

"Hello, Chekov." I nod at him.

A small grin erupts again on his face as he sits on the edge of his bed, gesturing for me to take the seat at the desk chair across from him. "Please, call me Pavel."

I don't smile back as I sit. "There's something I need to tell you."

"I thought so."

"I'm sorry to have to tell you this…" I have to take a moment to compose myself. Maybe I should have waited longer before coming here, just for a moment to compose myself. But maybe we don't have a moment to spare…

The fear that grips the young Russian is obvious. His whole body tenses as if preparing to be hit. His eyebrows raise in alarm, and that almost makes me lose what little composure I have. "Is bad news?"

I nod, trying to keep my breathing even. "It's really bad, Pavel."

He grips the edge of the bed tightly, physically bracing himself. The gesture brings tears stinging to my eyes.

"Tell me," he whispers. "I can take it."

"It's Sulu."

Chekov inhales sharply, his breath shaky. He is obviously trying to keep his self-control in front of me, his captain. "What… Is he all right?"

_No, _I think sharply, but I remain silent. The realization hits me hard. _He's not all right._

My silence is apparently the worst part for the ensign. "Is he alive?"

I can't answer, as much as he needs me to. My throat is closed up with tears for the crewman I may have lost, and the one I am losing right before my eyes. I want to shout at some higher power, scream into the black of space, _HE'S JUST A FUCKING KID!_ at the injustice of it all. But I can't say anything.

"Captain." I think I hear a quiet sob, but his face is buried in his hands. "Please answer-"

"I am so sorry." It's the only thing I can think to say, and it leaves my lips before I realize it. "I'm so, so sorry."

Chekov stands, and suddenly I feel so small and insignificant that it's like I am the one who's like a child here. "Is. He. Alive." His words are carefully enunciated, and this gesture finally pushes me over the edge.

"I don't know, goddammit!" I scream as I leap to my feet. "I don't fucking know!"

My outburst makes both of us lose the last semblances of equanimity. Chekov bursts into loud, childish sobs and I finally allow tears to run down my cheeks.

It finally hits me- I don't know what to do. A part of me was hoping I could just leave a note on the door to his quarters: _Sorry your best friend is dead. See you tomorrow on the bridge_.

But now he's crying and I'm crying and I don't have half a clue what to do. I awkwardly step forward and wrap my arms around him. He cries into my shoulder as I uneasily rub circles into his back.

"I'm so sorry, Pavel. He's in medbay. We don't know… McCoy doesn't know if he's going to make it."

After a minute, Chekov manages to control his breathing, although he can't stop the tears that are falling on his reddened cheeks. "How?"

"We don't know exactly. He and a landing party were exploring the planet, and they got attacked. We don't know how or why or by what, but he's the only one who's still alive. And barely."

I don't mean to be harsh, but I need to make him realize that Sulu needs him there.

"May I see him?"

I nod, and he nods back in acknowledgement as he runs out of the room.

I stand there for a moment, rubbing a hand over my face and brushing away stray tears. I can allow myself a minute to cry later. Right now, I have a ship to captain.

I have one last thought as I turn out the lights and leave the room.

Some days, I really hate my job.

***

**A/N: Okay, is it obvious that this is my first Star Trek fanfic? I just wanted some Chekov and Kirk, hurt/comfort type thing. Should I leave it at this? Should I continue it? If it goes on, expect Sulu and Chekov talking in medbay and Spock and Kirk talking about… well, I'm not sure yet. Just let me know what you think. **


	2. Sulu

When I awake, I register three things:

One, I am in the sickbay, hooked up to a bunch of machines. Two, my entire body really, _really_ hurts. Three, Chekov is at my bedside holding my hand.

I can't help but be concerned as I watch him. He holds my left hand in both of his in front of his face with his head bent over me. His mouth moves quickly as he mutters in Russian what I assume to be a prayer. His eyes are shut, but I can still see the dark circles around them. My best friend looks lost and dead on his feet.

"Hey," I croak without thinking. My throat feels dry and scratchy, and I decide that it would probably be best to let the boy wonder do most of the talking.

Chekov's eyes fly open at the sound of my voice, and his head jerks up. "Hikaru!" he cries as he throws his arms around me and hugs me tightly.

I can't stifle a loud groan as he jostles what must be a broken rib. "I missed you, too. How long was I out?"

"About nine hours," he replies, his eyes shining. "I was worried you would not wake up." He looks around the quiet sickbay, turning his entire torso to do so. "I should probably let Doctor McCoy know you're awake," he thinks aloud quietly. I can't be sure, but I think I see him not-so-subtly wipe some stray tears off his cheeks as he twists.

"Hey," I say for the second time in as many minutes, placing a hand on his shoulder. "Are you okay?"

Chekov looks back at me. "Yes. I was…" He sniffles, trying to quiet his now-obvious tears.

I scoot over on my bed, gesturing for him to join me. "Come here."

He gingerly climbs up and rests his head on my chest as I wrap my arms around him, rubbing soothing circles into his back as he cries freely now.

"It's okay. I'm fine, see?" I try to grin at him, but it's impossible to look cheerful when Pavel Chekov is laying on top of you sobbing.

"I was afraid that you would die!" I can barely hear him, his words muffled by my shoulder.

"Pavel." He doesn't answer me. "Pasha, look at me! I'm alive and well for the most part. I'm not going to die anytime soon."

This might be an easier promise to keep if I knew what had nearly killed me in the first place.

"You could have, though! Doctor McCoy told me-"

"Hey," I interrupt, "don't listen to what McCoy tells you, okay?" I grip his shoulders as best I can and try to make him look me in the eye. Luckily, he complies. "I. Am. _Fine_."

"I know," he says, wiping away the last of his tears. "I know. I feel like an idiot for worrying. I was just… I was frightened that you wouldn't know that I really care about you, that I wouldn't get to say goodbye to you…" He trails off, thankfully. I'm beginning to get a little choked up too.

"I know you care, Pavel." He lies back down on my chest, and I run my hand through his hair in what I hope is a comforting gesture. "I care about you too."

Unfortunately, at that moment he shifts, digging his elbow into my rib again.

"Goddammit!" I shout, shoving him away accidentally as I try to dull the stabbing in my side.

Chekov squeaks. "I am so sorry! I'll call Doctor McCoy."

As the young Russian runs off in the direction of McCoy's office, I realize with a grin that I could probably do worse for a friend than Pavel Chekov.

Chekov returns, literally pulling McCoy along behind him in his haste to make sure I'm okay.

"Welcome back," the doctor greets me in his gruff accent.

"It's good to be back, I guess," I mumble before he begins poking and prodding at my side. "Jesus!" I exclaim as he pokes a little too hard.

"How are you feeling?"

I can't help but retreat into grumpiness. What can I say? The doctor's attitude is contagious; in fact, he should probably offer a vaccine for it. "I'd feel better if you would stop poking me!"

McCoy grins slightly. "Good to hear it. How's your head?" he asks, shining a light in my eyes.

I blink furiously. "Okay, I guess. A little sore."

He begins to pull away bandages I hadn't even noticed were wrapped around my head. "Well, the bleeding is definitely not as bad, and it looks like the swelling has gone down some."

I notice that Chekov is hovering behind him, looking over McCoy's shoulder anxiously. "Is he okay?"

"He'll be fine, kid." McCoy adjusts a monitor next to my bed. "Heart rate's good, BP's normal, breathing's even." He smiles at me. "You should be just fine."

Chekov throws his arms around the doctor in a similar way to how he greeted me when I first woke up. Even without a broken rib or two, McCoy looks more uncomfortable than I felt. "Thank you so much, Doctor McCoy!"

I can tell that McCoy is fighting the urge to shove the younger man away, but I don't try to help him. It's much more entertaining this way.

"You're… welcome," he replies awkwardly. He finally manages to peel Chekov off and quickly retreats to his office again.

Chekov looks at me happily, and his joy is so infectious that I can't help but smile back. "You should get some rest, Hikaru. The captain will want you back on duty as soon as possible."

I have to agree. "I'll see you later?"

He nods. "I'll need to give everyone updates."

I want to cringe at the thought of everyone onboard knowing about my injuries, but I know they are just looking out for me. "Okay."

As Chekov leaves and I try to go back to sleep, I can't help but thing about the crew and how everyone looks out for each other. My last thought before reaching blessed slumber is that I have just decided what I like the most about _Enterprise_- we all watch out for and care about each other.

Just like a huge family.

***

**A/N: Wow, this was a little longer than what I was planning. I loved all the feedback I got on the last chapter, so I was really motivated to get some more up. Remember- I love to know what you think about my writing, so whether you love it or hate it, I want to hear about it! I am also open to any suggestions you may have on how to improve my writing or just ideas for the story. In the next chapter, expect Kirk and Spock having a little chat…**


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